Muscle Memory

Illustration by Sunny Wu

Muscle Memory

the shutting off of the alarm

buttoning buttons

i take a deep breath in

& then another

squint my my left eye in the sun

pick my lips till they almost bleed

turn lights on

turn them off

lean my forehead in for you to kiss

expect the best

check if enough cookies are made

drink some tea

wash hands

driving to your home &

no directions needed

waiting for a shoe to drop

listen first

question

second

third

sometimes a fourth

do you too, hesitate?

lie about your sexuality

look for something sweet

and some bourbon

the lighting of a candle

taking off socks in between the sheets

declaring the bed is your heaven

Karla James